There are doctors who prescribe medication and then there are doctors who treat a patient. With mutual respect much more can get done than with someone who simply throws medication about hoping it will stick.
Today was a day that everyone has been dreading. The talk with the doctor about stopping medication. My daughter has been feeling worse on the medications they tried and none of them have helped at all.
Being that she is getting older, she wants to be able to make medical decisions for herself. I agree, and I take her opinions into consideration when we work on treatment for her various problems. I don’t always agree with her opinions, but I allow her to have her say and we discuss it like adults. I insist that she is educated on the consequences of her opinions and most of the time when we differ, it is because she made a decision with her emotions and not her mind.
She is frustrated and angry about having to go every month and spend a day at the hospital in order to receive treatment that doesn’t work. Who wouldn’t be? Today was the day to discuss it with the doctor. I have previously brought it up with him, however, he wanted to hear it from her.
Today, a conversation between doctor and patient happened. I was not involved at all, really. I don’t mind because I told her if the doctor agreed, I was okay with it, but she would have to present it to him herself. I helped be her sounding board and played devil’s advocate to get her ready to have the first real adult conversation of her life.
She did well. It was a conversation of mutual respect. He gave her the courtesy of not only listening attentively, but asking questions without sounding judgmental. They talked it out, and came to the conclusion that they were going to try it her way. Give her a break until at least after her brain surgery.
I watched a doctor who has been treating her for three years tear up about how bad things are. He literally teared up about how she had to have brain surgery. He had to clear his throat before turning and talking to me. He readily admits he doesn’t have all the answers, but continues to search for them.
Seeing the level of trust that my daughter has for him, the respect they share and the compassion he has, I have to say that he is one of the best doctors out there. A doctor doesn’t treat a disease. A doctor treats a patient, all of them, including their fears and frustrations.